I have been told by coaches to do a lot of things, and they've said things that are far more profane and vulgar than "get horny for the puck."

There is a difference between thinking, which you must do in any sport, and doing too much analysis.

That's more of a Baltimore thing, don't you think? More of the "downy oshean" types versus the rest of the state?

Crab cakes, yes.

Hey, hey, hey, how about that full day with the field trip to Fort McHenry where we learned about how a drunk from western Maryland penned our national anthem? Of course they didn't tell us that he set the words to a drinking song.

Well, seeing how the Patriots just won the Super Bowl and the Jets haven't won one since almost a decade before Tom Brady was born, I think it's clear who you want to play for if you want a shot at a ring.

Was the baby a girl? Because if she was, that's a whole new meaning to "cunt punt." And let's get Kluwe to weigh in on whether proper punting technique was used.

That's exactly what I do. I freeze it and use it later.

They're actually being profit focused with the way they treat their employees. Every time you replace an entry level employee it costs about a quarter of their annual pay. You can either hire someone for $16K a year who's going to cost you $4K each of the three times you replace them or you can pay someone $24K who's…

I'd say that Dairy Queen's statement is pretty cut and dried. No non-therapeutic uses of medically important antibiotics in their chicken. I guess there's some wiggle room with the medically important part but how much?

Sadly, that was more effort than he ever gave when he was in Washington. So talented — Ovechkin may not have been the most talented Russian named Alexander on the team when both were Capitals. But he just seemed to not really care.

"You had one job, DTE! One job!"

Dick Vitale ceased to be relevant right about the time Bill Clinton was getting a hummer in the White House. Since then, the only thing he's good for is giving a hummer to coaches and programs he likes.

Will someone tell me what the hell Tijuana, Mexico has to do with this? I keep seeing TJ this, TJ that...guys, it's really overrated and the line to get back across the border is always a pain.

I have a problem with calling this the "post hitting era." If you think I'm wrong, two words. Adrian Peterson.

Kids have to learn that actions have consequences or when they are adults and they learn it, it will be a tough lesson. Get away with cursing out your parents and not having to listen to them? Try that when you get a job and see if you don't get bitch slapped like you should have as a child and fired at the same time.

Hunter Pence is lactose intolerant.

A piece the rips on Yelp reviewers that's not written by C.A. Pinkham? What's going on here?

Hmmm. A line of fertilizer?