His dream was to rush for 504 career yards? I hope he aims higher next time. Millenials—am I right?

if you look up strikeout on Wikipedia a picture of Adam Dunn literally shows up

Kale him? It damn near rectum...

This tweet to Sean Salisbury led to a multi-twitterer exchange that involved a detailed discussion (and negotiation!) of where he ranked among all Vikings QBs and, uh, fisting. After a few warnings, he blocked me. The sad thing is that he's apparently shut down his account so you can't see that he was a pretty good…

The other guy in this convo got blocked first for pointing out the center part, but I was surprised he got me so quickly

I've never been blocked, so I'm gonna tell the story of the time I blocked Darren Rovell on Twitter. It was maybe two years ago, and I was fake-RTing him saying dumb shit (which, yes, is obnoxious, but also funny sometimes!). I'd read about his (deeply wienery) habit of following people just long enough to send them…

Well I got blocked after I adarn'd ESPN

So proud

I don't know of any athletes or other sports figures that have me blocked, but I am followed by Fernando Tatis. I am, however, blocked by Patton Oswalt and Kevin Smith.

This is fake. These are way too coherent to be legit Steiner quotes.

Oh Jeety. We'll miss you, you lovable scamp.

"Is that... Herbal Essences?"

Ever heard of Stockholm Syndrome buddy? And do you really think a man hitting a woman is the same thing as a man hitting a man? Get real bro.

To be fair, I see where you're coming from.

It's as if he doesn't understand that by saying "change the sex" means "change virtually every physical characteristic of the victim"

Mondaymorningquarterback is the guy asking the woman who claims she was raped what she was wearing at the time of the incident.

If another man struck Ray Rice and he hit him back we would say this punishment is unjustified because he was defending himself. Change the sex and he's a Monster who needs to be kicked out of the League?

I hit it daily, nightly, and ever so rightly.

I stopped reading after you began your point by saying "First of all, Lets look at the facts of Ray Rice case. One, He struck his girlfriend once. It wasn't some savage OJ style beating"

You NEVER hit a woman.