I don’t give a shit if it’s Easter or Yom Kippur or Ramadan or whatever, this is a crisis, and Congress needs to do the jobs they were elected to do right now. As far as meeting with constituents, there’ll be plenty of time to kiss babies and suck up to millionaires in their districts later.

Window seat, duh. Each of the three people crammed in that tiny area get their individual privileges as (very) minor compensation for their discomfort:

Reading this, I felt not schadenfreude, not anger, but... sadness. Not for Trump, of course—no, fuck him and his minions with a hydraulic press, and then fire the pulpy leftovers into the sun—but for the country. There are so many profoundly stupid people in this country who have blindly followed him up to now and…

Reminds me of the time the Eagles swilled pickle juice before going out and trouncing the Cowboys in Texas Stadium when the temperature on the field was like 140°F. Same principle: vinegar = electrolytes

I have no intention of paying a nickel for anything in it, but I’m having a blast with Mario Kart Tour. There aren’t any ads, the controls are fine for a mobile device (what do you want from a game on a tiny touchscreen?), and it has that gorgeous, whimsical visual and audio aesthetic that no one does as well as…

I was sifting through Amazon Prime last night and decided to put the game on right before this happened. I literally thought he might be dead.

That was even worse! That wasn't just some numerological aesthetic, that was a goddamn record! 

So... CB Bucknor is the hero because he made an intentionally bad call to end this episode of bullshitball? Man, fuck everyone associated with this farce.

That lede photo is everything I hope my son will not grow up to be.

It's a wonderful novelty late at night, if you're driving somewhere remote. When the Cavs beat the Warriors a few years ago, I was driving in Maryland and listening to the game on a Cleveland radio station. Fantastic stuff.

This underplays what Orgo Night is. I saw this story elsewhere, and it led me into a rabbit hole. Here’s what I took away (and I’ll happily stand corrected if any Columbia alumni can offer better info):

Generally agreed, and it would be nice if people in the media actually used word like lie and liar about Trump. But I think gaslighting works well here because it’s a more specific, more elaborate thing. When my wife asks me if I actually ate sixteen oreos for breakfast and I deny it, that’s a lie. But if I were to…

If I’ve got this straight, a man made out of beer money signs feels pity for old racists who tweet. I think.

The second is that House Speaker Nancy Pelosi and her allies appear to think that the Ukraine issue is easier for the public to understand, which seems highly condescending.

Completely unrelated comment is unrelated; all other readers, please skip ahead.

Kudos are indeed in order for any coach who shows even the tiniest set of gonads in those situations. But any team that has played the Dolphins or Jets this year gets an enormous asterisk next to its record, as in *played a bowling league in NFL uniforms.

The Jaguars Junction comparisons are misguided. Jaguars Junction is a tone poem; The Blowhole is "Beowulf" on PCP.

#NeverBiden, #NeverKlobuchar

What the fuck is homophobic about that? His last name has Buttigieg? It starts with B-U-T-T. Like ass. Like booty. Like behind. Like backside. He has a butt, and he's gay. I have a butt, and I’m straight. I bet you have a butt, and I don't give a tenth of a fuck what your sexual orientation is. All I know is, you…

I get that the 80s were a lawless time fueled by cocaine, spandex, and a willful hostility to sanity, but how in the bluest of hells did that place not get shut down the day after it opened?