I'll give her the benefit of the doubt here. Even if she personally wouldn't find that offensive (which I doubt), she's savvy enough to repudiate it in the moment if she had heard it.

Tom Brady will suffer a season-ending Achilles injury and the Patriots will sign Andrew Luck.

ESPN reports that he can sign a new contract as of 4:01 pm EDT. He will be a Patriot by 4:02.

David Brooks is the journalistic equivalent of gravy soup.

In general, I’m a pacifist. Nazis, though? Smash ‘em to bits.

“[T]he security team also has no interest in dealing with fans like that, since their job is to protect the wrestlers and not the fans.”

I have an idea. Hear me out. Let Pam Anderson and Meghan McCain have their own show somewhere, far away from the rest of us, like Antarctica or Mars, and let them hash out the issues of the day.

Maybe, I dunno, they should check credentials before letting anyone into the press section, and make it at least a little difficult to crawl over seats into that section.

I’m legitimately concerned about the kind of childhood this woman had. Normally, I wouldn’t think twice about it, but this week did also bring the news of that kid who went blind from a fucked-up diet.

I mean, there’s no reason why girls and women shouldn’t be subjected to the horrors of chronic neurological and orthopedic trauma, too. So, yay, progress?

Just one question: what's your favorite flavor boot polish?

Yeah! Talk down to people! That’s the way to do it!

Short answer: no.

That tweet with the white woman smugly cutting the dreads off a black man literally made me throw up in my mouth.

Tell you what, you convince my company’s IT to use something else, my colleagues and I will give you all the Lenovo ShitPads you can handle. Between the display issues, the flimsy power cords, the weird crashes, the audio device failures, and the seemingly imaginary wifi, we find the average lifespan for a machine to…

Tell you what, you convince my company’s IT to use something else, my colleagues and I will give you all the Lenovo…

*grabs bullhorn*

Jim Boone is a despicable piece of shit. Sorry, I can’t think of a joke.

I dunno, call me old fashioned, but whining about a helmet and posting poorly punctuated Instagram rants doesn’t quite add up to improving the image of a rapist.

There is more likelihood that I will sprout wings and, with my newfound ability to fly, choose to visit Chernobyl than there is that the lost AEW title fiasco wasn’t a work.

perfectly edible carp