As long as Jim Cornette and people who knew Randy Savage are still alive, Oliver will remain in business.

All this pedantic bullshit about colors and yet you can't be bothered to capitalize the genus? Pfft.

What happened to that Cam Newton kid anyway? (And what kind of name is "Cam"? What's that short for? Camera? Camouflage? Cammopotamus?)

The optimal number of dogs to have is one cat.

I am 100% in favor of a catapult for officials. May I humbly add that, in sports in which coaches may initiate a video review, if the review upholds the call on the field, the coach who initiated the review also gets catapulted.

Oh my sweet summer child...

As a white dude who falls into two, maybe three of these categories (#2, #7, and maybe #1; there have been a few new families move into the neighborhood recently and I haven’t been keeping score), I’m all for this.

See? Dieter Ruehle is why the Deadspin Hall of Fame needs to be a thing again. That, and the fact that Piggy Poop Balls never got his rightful induction.

Oh I dunno, even when it cost exponentially more lives and materiel, we were pretty fond of war. About half this country have always been crazy, stupid hawks, and getting rid of the draft just isolated that segment even further.

Of all the things I hate Trump for, the inevitable war with Iran isn’t necessarily one of them. The United States has been at war every year of its existence except 17* of them. By my reckoning, only two of those wars, totaling eight years, have been just. Point being, this nation is really good at finding itself in…

What a hilarious impersonation of an idiotic neocon. Thanks for the chuckle. A+

Careful, if you clutch those pearls any harder, you'll get callouses on your hands.

As a basketball player? You’re absolutely right. As a human being? Well, I guess people like Idi Amin and Ted Bundy did exist, so...

Do Deadspin writers get paid by the word? Because "Dana White is a piece of shit" is a lot more succinct. You can even copy and paste it every time the need for one of these stories arises.

I would agree with your first sentence if the person bestowing the honor were anyone but DJT. But Trump does absolutely nothing without considering A) how it will reflect on him, and B) how it will play to his base. Honoring a faux-modest white basketball legend from generations ago, when there are dozens if not…

Honestly, after the first few sentences, I expected this to be a piece about an upcoming labor stoppage. In that light, salary cap uncertainty is positively good news.

Much like Donald Trump made us all weirdly nostalgic for George W. Bush, I have a feeling the Mavenbrahs will make us long for the salad days of Peter King.

Ray Ratto believes some sports league will within the next five years learn how to monetize hell.

The intellectual sewer that is ESPN deserves Fury, and vice versa.

Yeah, this was my first thought, too. Jim Hellwig--Warrior--whateverthefuck, was the shit worst, but man, how fucking great is it that his imagery is being used to celebrate LGBTQ+.