Ah yes, male terrorists have complex political, cultural and religious reasons for killing people. Female terrorists are sad and cranky because their babies and/or husbands died.

"I'm a news guy but here is a small sampling from our facebook page. Their words, not mine."

Subject: Thought You Could Use This Now

Hey!

At least he, by crossing the street, was able to gain ten yards.

Projected Cowboys draft picks, 2014:

The real question is which team will Matt Flynn sign with before getting cut by training camp next year..

Kareful your about to get stabed.

I also believe it's time for Gerrard to lose some minutes...

Chelsea has so many creators; even though neither Torres nor Eto'o worries me in the least, Lucas, Skrtel and Sakho/Agger/Kolo/whomever are going to have their hands full if any three of Hazard, Oscar, Willian and Mata play together. At least they don't have a beast on set pieces, that's the one defensive weakness…

Coming into this stretch, I thought that four points was a reasonable expectation to take from White Hart Lane, Etihad and Stamford Bridge; that's still eminently doable. I don't think Chelsea outclasses Liverpool at all, but I'm certainly not going to predict a road win — heading into 2014 keeping pace at 37 points…

Vagina: SODA CAN (Cherry Coke, first time)

Seems weird to mention Liverpool "may feel a little hard done not to salvage a point" without noting that early on the linesman blew an offside call that would've had Sterling one-on-one with Joe Hart.

His back? First his collarbone, now this.

I almost sprayed my coffee all over the desk thank you.

Penis: SODA CAN (DR. PECKER)

Rectum: Soda Can (Brokeback Mountain Dew)

Tarpinian: [Passes out]

"CLASSMATE PUT A ROCK IN EAR, HAS PIECE OF PAPER IN OTHER EAR"

and Newton—a supremely talented athlete who doesn't fit nicely into any kind of mold—is their next logical target.