I am delighted that the phrase “Chuck Johnson” has become a euphemism.

Coolest. Animal. Ever.

See also: Narwhals.

“What’s the problem? I was told to stand here, and wear this hat and jack..... oh shit.”

It’s amazing how liberating it is to stop giving a shit about what makes you “manly” and what doesn’t.

Step one to increasing your ‘masculinity’ is to give zero fucks what some other person thinks about you, your capabilities or how you spend your time. You get one life - live it the way you want.

He should dump everything we’ve got on Putin and start a cyberwar with Russia on Jan. 1. Give it a few weeks to get ramped up and the country to realize we are, in fact, at war with them, then check out and let Trump deal with the fallout.

That puppy is cute as fuck.

“to essentially strip the U.S. of its credibility as a global leader”

Five minutes? I think you mean two.

Its because we’re dumb. And we have a national attention span tha… HOLY SHIT IS THAT A BIRD!?!?!

for example: magnets, how do they work? nobody knows except wizards and they aren’t talking

Yeah, but Canadians are bit more humble about that sort of thing. Americans live in hope that their ancestors were some sort of dispossessed nobles. (My Canadian ancestor, of whom I have a picture from the 1870s, was a lumberjack who sported a pair of gold earrings - cooler than some random Eurotrash, IMHO.)

Oh honey. You’re not so bad yet. I’ve gone to swigging right from the milk carton.

SOunds like a part of Death Stranding will take place on Mars and Jupiter for whatever crazy reason Kojima comes up with

At first glance, I interpreted that title as Kojima wanting to send a copy of Death Stranding to Jupiter.

There are good Christmas songs, but they focus more on the misery than the silver bells and love.

You sir are a saint. I own socks with the correct rhyme on them, they’re DC licensed.

60 million plus people just proved that they hate America. So there ya go.

I’m Commander Shepard and this is my favoritest take on the Citadel.