Fictional characters: Sean Newell's girlfriend

When that prompter turns off, she turns into Kyle Mooney. Seriously, that's just how she talks.

I saw this earlier they just filmed like 50 of these and deleted the ones that didn't come true

The celebrations hit a momentary lull when Christoph Kramer took the microphone and wished everyone a very Merry Christmas.

Batting average? Honey, call the retirement home. Somebody let Pops use the computer again.

That's the ugliest fucking bow tie I've ever seen.

There's gotta be a better term for this than "footage".

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Congrats on winning... one game... more than England!

And yet, Chess has separate gender leagues.

yeah, that mateen cleaves was a real world beater

Adam Silver is a good fucking commissioner. When was the last time we could say the Big 4 in sports had at least one good commissioner?

All those articles were written by the same person, congrats on having ONE writer that doesn't feel the need to gobble his balls all the time.

Is Deadspin still mad as fuck that Lebron didn't win? Get over it already, worse than Cardinal fans the lot of you in that staff.

The pig did, in fact, die due to complications from massive internal bleeding. According to those who were with him for the final minutes, his last words were simply "Th-th-th-that's all folks!"

I don't think the Heat will have to worry about Wade. He hasn't been able to exercise in years.

Bradley has not been our best player. He looked lost against Ghana. They repeatedly blew by him like he was standing still. He looked like somebody's kid brother they had to let play to make it even teams.

He was still bad against Portugal, repeatedly getting dispossessed, missing a WIDE OPEN NET by kicking it at the…