"Highlights, humph."

He could walk 500 miles and then walk 500 more and he'd still be no closer to Cooperstown.

Our long national nightmare is still rolling down a slight slope.

What a prick.

This photo was taken only a moment after Putin shot his tie off of his neck to silence a journalist.

Look- another positive story involving a cycle!

Was really hoping this would be that elusive Jeanette Lee sex tape.

Dejongh was captured when the police followed the trail of breadcrumbs, sherry, and garlic.

+1...

There is a lot of futile pulling, a lot of good-meaning-but-ultimately useless assistance from khaki-wearing guys and a lot of panting

You can tell he's drunk in the picture- the wild eyes, the smirk on his face. Oh, and Seguin might be drunk too.

Seeing Screamers on that list brings back memories. We used to steal them from our uncle's cooler. We didn't get drunk; we just didn't want to have to drag him up a flight of stairs to bed again.

The manager really needs to control these 'Nuts. He needs to be in charge.

So when does @MLB buy this tweet as source material?

Thug hotcake life.

What did they expect with all those tender vittels all over the course.

Wow. You got all that from an old batman episode?

Maybe you could get the Georgia Satellites to play the wedding.

Here's a good shot, taken by Viktor Stalberg:

Parted on the side and clean around the edges? OK, please sit up straight in the chair for me... Oh...