Confessions Of A Second-Grade Reaganite

Paying homage to his Aussie upbringing, Moylan will be traveling to the ESPY's in a pink bus with a silver shoe on top.

Holiday DUAN

Any particular posts?

Consentino? Oh, good. At last, Pennsylvanian teams might finally get some support at Deadspin, they've been really underrepresented around here.

People knew Blatter had completed his Nixonian transformation when he referred to his opponents as nattering nabobs of negativity.

"I see no problems with that."

I don't know if you guys have heard this, but I've heard that Chris Spielman really loves having Satanic sex ceremonies involving midgets and burros. I don't know if you guys heard that or not, but that's what I heard.

I think my little cousin's banging on pots and pans for the 1995 Santa Rosa Elementary School Spring play would've made for a more deserving recipient.

I believe there's a high correlation between believing Jeter deserves an All-Star appearance and finding Dane Cook to be funny.

That goes in the same file as Crash for Best Picture and Rent winning the Tony for Best Musical.

Left on the cutting room floor was Game 6 the 2006 Finals, which merely showed Mark Cuban's head popping off his body.

I have to admit, this has been the most I've watched of the NBA playoffs in quite a few years. Tons of great games, 2 insufferable teams (Spurs, Lakers) getting trounced in humiliating fashion early on, and lots of stars that haven't been to this stage much, if ever. Regardless of who comes out, there will be a new…

Joke's on Einhorn. While he may get a sixth of the team, by that point the Mets will be only worth an eighth.

Given the Strife outlined in this Cloud, I'm shocked there's no accompanying Buster Sword.

Welp, see ya later everyone. Have a Great Memorial Day and thank any friend or family member that's a veteran. Out!

Are you aware that Jason Whitlock is corpulent?

In Soviet Russia, overdone memes make you!

T-Minus 58 minutes to the three day weekend. Run, you stupid fucking clock, run!