I believed that in order for a woman to get pregnant, she and her husband had to pray for it to happen.

Rome feels prepared for the hearing, seeing as how he's well-versed in accusative language.

That's excellent.

Bryce is just retaliating after Neal called Harper "The Frozen One" after Harper's first at-bat.

This isn't as bad as the time a coked-out Whitney Houston attacked two Ivy League-bound high school seniors after she overheard one of them say, "I'd have gone with Brown."

"And we kick it off with a full-strength squad, against our timid yet friendly neighbors to the north."

DUAN

If this guy wanted to find out how to once again touch his python with his right hand, he should have consulted someone other than the Oracle of Delphinus.

Nice.

Because he wanted to have a lucky 'phin.

Don't worry, USC. Tommy Tuberville and the rest of the 2004 Auburn team will protect your house.

We will all get to read about this in Kissinger's upcoming memoir, "Years of Singspiel."

Holgorsen needs to learn that the only acceptable time to get confrontational at a bar is when the Mountain Dew runs out.

"Queen-mother adulterer Anne Boleyn seen decomposing at Henry VIII's in early 1536"

+1

"Still a bit bloody to. But that's all normal."

Carlos Mencia just tweeted, "@GeorgeLopez I am quite worried about the color of your face."

My dad showed me that picture today. I told him I was the first to give the creator a +1.

Ha! Loved your comment as well. Good stuff.

I didn't read your whole post because it just sounded like a bunch of whining, but maybe you should just date someone else for the summer.