Statistics are hard...

Right there with Big Bang Sheldon and, well, anything else CBS plops out for big dumbdumbs to tune in to.

Take your star you glorious idiot.

It's pretty good.

This poor guy. Nobody takes him seriously.

My cat committed a sofa violation yesterday. Wait, sorry, I think we’re talking about different things...

Women or otherwise, these people are morally bankrupt.

Yeah, schools are political as hell. I was relaying this story to my wife who works at a university, yet lacks my appetite for cheap kicks on a website like this. She just says - good thing the bud bug guy isn’t a major donor or anything, otherwise this wouldn’t be a fun story at all.

You're a monster

No, no, no - the appendix carry is when you keep your gun in the back of a book.

Speak for yourself, kemosabe.

Growing up in the American south, football was always the sport that I dug the most. But I’ll be goddamned if it’s not losing its palatability real quick. For a litany of reasons.

I'm gonna get on this. I work by a Popeye's and step out for food on the reg and don't want a five piece dinner. This is life affirming. 

It’s not that bad...

Your cat is just under four feet tall? Holy smokes.

I love this game with all of my heart. A crazy story, unique mechanics, inviting characters, laced up with an incredible soundtrack.

Can we talk for a second about the band playing a song from Zelda?

Uncontestable

Yeah it is. I pulled some off and chewed it once. Got sick as a dog.

If you ever wondered what Simon Pegg would look like as He-Man...