I only buy artisanal linguines washed in the dewdrops of a mountain bluebell.

It's like over-ripe ravioli. Cheesy and stinky.

Me too. Lots of experimentation. Can't stand the smell of the stuff now.

In a monogrammed bowl. With whole wheat toast.

But is the bowl monogrammed?

Nuts? I only eat ground walnuts. I'm allergic to whole nuts.

Guess my ex will be entering for free.

Using a Korporate Kard.

Bazinga.

YO BRUCE!!!! HEED THE WORDS OF THE MASTERS!

I got Cherry as well.

Hmmm... you could be in the office next to me. Are you in Chicago?

Think 1/4oz avoir du pois, a little more/ a little less, depending on what you feel like. For maple syrup, it's mostly more.

Obviously he's NOT getting a vaccination to prevent stupidity.

I had no idea she was into Astronomy.

At least Farrah's lips now balance out her boobs.

Dear Jen:

The ex-boyfriend who worked sex like an ADHD jack rabbit who said, 'what, are you just going to lie there?' while hammering away. I looked at the ceiling and thought, 'peach. the ceiling needs to be painted peach' and hung onto the side of the bed.

I needs my gin (Hendricks) and tonic to quoff, and lots of pizza pizza pizza*. My weekend is now officially awesome!!