This immediately reminded me of an old episode of Doug; "The shoe doesn't count!"

As a Giants fan I'm contractually obliged to say fuck Jim Fassell. And fuck Sean Payton too. How come the Saints prescription pill scandal is never mentioned? I think that's a bigger deal than Bountygate.

Drew didn't print my boring anecdote so I'll leave it here.

As a Saints fan and nearby resident, I hate THE NARRATIVE. So I can only imagine how sick everyone else is of it. You know the one. New Orleans was a cesspool, basically two steps from being a third-world country. And then all of the sudden, the EXACT MOMENT Tracy Porter picked off Peyton Manning, the city had been…

"Northeast trash heap shitholes that decide to invade our generic city with a decent climate and agreeable economy. Fuck all of you."

Your city has an agreeable economy because those Northeast trash heap shitholes had to send their tax dollars to bail out the evil company that built your city after it shit the bed.

Mrs. Simpson, don't you worry. I watched Matlock in a bar last night. The sound wasn't on, but I think I got the gist of it.

Sponsored by and for Crackers!

With heavy hearts, we momentarily drag our attention away from Johnny Maziel's spectacular preseason debut.

Darren Rovell prays for the widow, #CheezIt354, and their children #CheezIt356 and #CheezeIt357.

Well, eating Cheez-Its will do that to a heart.

You can talk about Ray Rice at ESPN, as long as you talk about the "warm reception" he got Thursday night, or the "words of wisdom" his now-wife told him before the game.

I guess they're dropping the spread option.

Sal: Not to beat a dead horse, Ray, but what did your wi...

Good thing Erin Andrews wasn't there. She probably would have totally blown that hard-hitting question.

NCAA to Players: It's not fair that the sports that make the most money should follow a different set of rules from all of the other athletes.

When corporate-sponsored, federally protected billion dollar organizations resort to Marxism to justify their position (on anything), it's pretty clear they don't even believe what they're saying.

We're nearly at peak "issue white people pay to attention to in an effort to buy social capital." I don't have a dog in this fight, either way I could not care less, but it'll be interesting how long the #outrage persists if Snyder continues to defy.

Washington Times: owned and run by an insecure megalomaniacal fanatic who demands conformity of opinion within the organization

Does anyone under the age of 50 give a shit about PED use in MLB? The hand wringing always seems to come from old folks who can't fathom that players have been cheating forever.

Man, fat guys who haven't been laid this century are about to lay down some fiery hot takes about women and "their place" in this comment section.