M-I-Z...

Knee surgery daaaaaable check.

Now the middle class is spoiled too? I guess there aren't many of us left so I didn't notice.

A liter of cola would have come in handy, though.

A Schiano woMan would have turned around and whipped that basketball right back at the person that shot it.

Richie Incognito called her a half blond.

How far can she cunt punt a football, though?

If she was a reporter for the Cardinals she would be getting balls bounced off her dome the right way.

It's a Fine Line to cross.

Ecstasy was a bad choice.

redacted

I thought at Kentucky the freshmen would haze the older guys for being untalented enough to still be around.

Let me know when he goes for too high of a stack and misses.

Lochte: Wheaties can fix that, right?

His No Limit Soldiers tie was at the dry cleaners.

Next spring ABC's hit comedy Two and a Half Men will return, this time starring father and son Incognito and Jonathan Martin. Hijinks are expected to ensue.

Northwestern has a $7 billion endowment but they sell out for a publicity stunt, and the wounded warrior project ends up getting 10k or something. PR GURU indeed.

I'm twice the man you are.
-Riley Cooper

Aldon Smith attempted a reverse drunk, and it did not go well.

Incognito has issued a statement reminding rookies that they are still on the hook for all of his meals even while he is on suspension.