Ted will be pulled over in the middle of a rainy night, with unprescribed viagra, open alcohol containers, and a 13 year old girl in a state of undress in the passenger seat. He will immediately plead guilty, the media will go insane, and conservatives will pretend it’s not even happening. Ted will beg for a plea deal…

Don’t be silly. Ted is too much of a chickenshit to get into a gunfight with an armed human being.

I’ve often thought that this is how Ted Nugent will die.

I blame rap music.

No one using a Ricky avatar has any right to tell someone to "do the science" just cook your chicken tenders on your burnt out car and be happy you can still skim smokes off the boys.

I see you are an expert and have been working tirelessly to expose these monsters, rather than just posting on Jezebel

Because the best way to judge a city is how it looks from the highway...

Dude, black olives taste great on pizza.

I had similar thoughts.

This is definitely more "flyover" bashing, painfully typical of the Gawker media family, and something openly admitted in the introduction to this article.

A couple things. I moved to St. Louis when I was 11 (26 now and live in KC) and the first thing we did after we got there was order some Imo's. We hated it, but I have to say after enough years it grows on you, a little. Still, the only Imos I'll eat is if someone else buys it.

Sure St. Louis is a giant shit hold filled with a 90% racial divide, along with severe urban sprawl issues but you know what its our shit hole. So while I'm sure that everyone commenting on this lives in the Wizard of Oz where all the food is fucking perfect, no crimes are ever committed and your sports figures are…

"people from St. Louis are possibly the most annoying people in the world"

St. Louis: the only city in America with both a superiority and an inferiority complex.

I know it probably will work out poorly for your relationships with these people, but... Can you drink more whiskey tonight and do more drunk voicemails?

it took me 3 glasses of whisky to get through this episode without dying of secondhand embarrassment.

I might buy aggressive geese just for building just for the dogs...

I will not participate in the tone policing of badgers. Express yourself, badger.

When are the leaders in the badger community going to finally step up and take responsibility for their anger issues?

After decades of hearing about someone badgering a witness, I'm finally witnessing a badger.

Someone bring him to Cosby's next appearance.