Is...is it incredibly telling that I thought the shoehorn was a riding crop at first?

I'm aware of that, but I find bland, useless female characters that are there for no other reason than to facilitate a romantic subplot just as annoying.

Maybe this makes me a terrible person, but am I the only one who's hoping Peeta will die if only so he can stop almost dying every few minutes?

SPOILERS FOR MOCKINGJAY AHEAD!

At least Katy Perry knows she makes crappy dance music and doesn't go around pretending shes David Fuckin' Bowie or, you know, a person who is a real artist.

Thats nice, call me when she makes a piece of music that does not suck donkey balls.

every time PETA is mentioned, this appears in my minds eye.

Lindsay Lohan is some delusional narcissist or she's just desperate for money and attention (or both). Didn't she do this before about some commercial that featured some character named Lindsay that had nothing to do with her persona? Can you really sue about something as subjective as "Oh, she kind of looks like me"?…

Hey, hey! Life in the dream house!

It's not the Muppets' fault. That would be like blaming the Star Wars Holiday Special on Chewbacca. The Muppets will be fine.

Katy Perry with The Muppets would have been better. She's practically a human Muppet anyway! And I mean that as high praise to her.

It didn't start until 8:30 p.m. in my time zone, and wasn't over until 10 p.m. - waaay after my 6-year-old's bedtime.

I don't recognize any of that as food.

Atheist high five.