No worries.

Yes, I totally get that. Even if someone doesn’t know about the Don Imus incident or even who he was, should certainly know that calling someone a ho, especially a black woman, is highly insulting. Thanks!

What exactly? Engaging in conversation and asking respectful questions? I’m an ally, always have been, always will be. Plus, I find language and slang in particular to be fascinating and the ways they evolve (or devolve) are important to understand. 

Thank you, yes I totally get the distinction. I appreciate your response.

Yes, thank you for this clarification. That completely explains the nuances I observed as a kid. 

Thanks, that makes total sense. And I think that’s what I internalized as a child.

I had to look up AAVE! Thanks for your response. I definitely do use words I grew up with that fit in this category, like chill for example. Some words are so common now that they’re so widely used I wonder how they can be avoided. Like, cool, for example. I get your point though, for sure.

Sure, but that was my adult recollection of what I remember feeling as a child. Thanks.

Yes, I knew I shouldn’t say it. That’s an adult’s recollection of what I remember thinking as a kid. So, I don’t think that means I “knew it was a slur.” But thank you for your response.

I did not know this was a slur. I grew up in a very diverse area near NYC. I heard this term all the time on my block and in my school, by my Black friends describing their own hair or their friends/siblings/kids etc. Sometimes it was clearly said in jest and other times it was clearly meant to insult someone, but it…

you lost me at, “before there was Madonna or Cher there was Adam.” Everyone read The Coddling of the American Mind and the Gift of Fear. 

Thanks. It wasn’t until I got older that I realized the first red flag was so obvious, but not to a kid: who asks a ten year old for directions?

I went to the link but it just takes me to the same thing--the visuals with the story being read. Where’s the original story? Any idea?

That was from a few years ago. Still my all time fave. 

Doll shop? NOPE!

ROFL!!!

Yup. First thing I thought of. You hear someone in your house, you go get your kids.

I’ve told this story before but it’s a perfect example of this. When I was about 10 yrs. old, playing outside my house. A man in his car stopped at the bottom of my driveway. He was shirtless, alone and probably in his early 30's. He called me to him and I just start walking towards him. He asked me directions and I…

At my father’s wake, my cousin told us that she had a dream about my father. They weren’t particularly close and she’d never dreamed of him before. In the dream he was sitting in a white room, she entered, kissed him on the cheek and left. The next morning her sister called her to tell her my dad died. I was super…

Wooooboy! Best one I’ve read so far. Shudder.