There is a reason we have a justice system set up the way we do, and you're pretty much it. Scary.

Interestingly, according to Deadspin's own feature on Nauert, he's known for his incredible patience and calmness in games. Also for his gigantic strike zone. Apparently, there is virtually nothing you can do to rile him, except, I guess, whatever Torii Hunter did.

Thanks for the long, thoughtful response.

Yeah, Brentwood is one of those places.

I'm struggling to give a shit about this angle of the story.

Yeah, if there's a controversy here, it's teaching kids that you can go to Missouri and be a successful person. Talk about sending the wrong message.

You know what my problem is — I'm not a lane hog. I'm someone who uses the left lane to pass and then gets the fuck out of the way. There is zero reason to stay in front of a tailgater — they're a dangerous driver.

Yeah, I get out of the way too — as quickly and safely as I can. But that doesn't matter to tailgaters — they're just irresponsible drivers.

Nothing you've said conflicts with anything I've said. I'm aware of how to signal to cars that I'm trying to move over, and I'm aware of how to find a spot to move over. To the average tailgater none of that matters. If you're tailgating, you're probably a terrible driver and you definitely aren't respectful or…

So, uh, yeah. That's what I'm describing. You use the left lane to pass, and get past people on the right. The fact that I'm only travelling significantly over the speed limit instead of insanely over the speed limit doesn't mean I'm doing anything wrong, so long as I get out of the left lane as quickly as I can.

I am not pulling unlikely situations out of my ass, I'm describing common situations that anyone who has ever driven on a highway encounters regularly and which are caused by shitty drivers that I bear no responsibility for. The fact there is some dipshit in front of me, or to the right of me that I'm trying to get…

I'm not often in a situation where I cause people to tailgate me. In fact, I'm never in a situation where I cause anyone to tailgate. Tailgating is always wrong, Always. There is no cause for it except for being a terrible driver.

it's like you're not even reading posts at this point. If I'm in the left lane, which we have all agreed is for passing, so therefore I'm clearly in the act of passing, and I'm going as fast as the people in front of me, but am just not passing fast enough for the asshole behind me, the asshole behind me can fucking…

No.

It is also against the law in most states to tailgate and pass on the right. Have you ever driven a car?

You definitely shouldn't have a license, and I suspect you have never driven a car.

I don't have any particular like for elaborate hypotheticals, I much prefer saying something reasonable like "there may be a reason other than stupidity or stubborness that the person in front of you is not immediately swerving out of your way", but you wanted to be a difficult prick and so specific examples are…

There is no situation where it is impossible to get over. But there are plenty of situations especially in places like the southern half of the NJT which is two-lane, chock full of assholes, where the situation is more complicated than "THIS PERSON IN THE LEFT LANE CLEARLY DOESN'T UNDERSTAND THE RULES OF THE ROAD AND…

You find the concept of being blocked in by people passing on the right a strange concept. Anyone who has driven on the highway understands it.

Clearly, you've never driven in New Jersey.