It’s like they all went to see Oprah and the day’s surprise audience gift was cognitive dissonance.

Yes. All this.

Rookie mistake. Document, document, then fire the people who aren’t playing ball. Sorry, dinos, you can learn to live in the new world or YOU can learn to freelance.

THIS. If it’s true that nobody called the bomb squad, then how are they sticking with this story with a straight face? If anyone for one second thought it was actually a bomb, things would have gone differently.

Hahaha, bath(tub) gin...

Anyone else out there who thought this was going to somehow involve the words “ooga chaka?"

Yes, I’m very aware of this. As I said to someone already earlier, in always confusing the names. I’m also not in the mood to edit.

Ok, whichever. I get them mixed up all the time.

Hospitals charge a lot. Americans try to avoid then except for emergencies. They are not ideal for primary care.

I’m so cynical, my assumption was, wow, that’s a lot of Medicare fraud.

Wouldn’t it be nice if a large percentage of the “I’ll just send a dick pic” male profiles were actually bots designed to be like that? That would make me feel better about humanity.

This sentence makes me cry on the inside. My 1 year olds are currently tearing apart their room, I’m sick, and my husband just went to band practice. Fuck everything.

This, this. All.day.this.

Funny cuz it’s true. I worked in the office of a trucking co once, and I can testify that many many of the drivers were not functionally literate.

It’s the smell of culture.

To be fair to those tables, though, pretty much anything left outside in NYC is filthy.

From my own outside observations, this seems like a legit sales pitch. “Join us, and you shall be beaten into glorious, starving, blonde insanity.” I approve in the name of truth in advertising.

All the times I’ve ever suggested a particular choice or path of movement in this whole “parenting” scheme to my husband, and he’s like, “why?” and my response I want to give is, “because I just know it because I pay attention and read things,” but I already know that will not be recognized as a valid response, so I…

Possum story time! One time I was coming in my front door at night, no light on, and after I opened the outer glass door, looked down and saw I’d trapped a cat in the corner of the stoop with the now open door. To be nice, I closed the door some, giving the cat room to escape, but it didn’t move. Aww, I thought, kitty…

I find war and corporate welfare to be the most gruesome procedures. Where is the vote to defund these things?