A girl asked my high school biology teacher if you could get pregnant from swallowing.

Congratulations - you're now overqualified for Congress.

This reminds me of the time I saw Lord of the Rings and then I started summoning giant walls of water to expel ring wraiths from Rivendell.

So at this place, everything tastes like ham?

This is pretty much all my experiences on OKCupid, in a nutshell:

There was this guy today at the cafe, where we were the only two people in the room, and he kept on staring at me, while I was eating, doing homework, and using the phone. And as I was using Tinder, I saw his profile, it was quite racially charged and full of fetishization (think confederate flags, Yellow Fever,…

Hey, I hear it's still the in thing to do in North Korea!

Its time for the moderate whites to start taking some responsibility.

Trying to remember a time when militant, unwavering nationalism was required for all citizens.....

Why can't the white community control their inbred bigots?

Get over it. It's going to happen. We won.

One thing that has always bothered me, how we focus on cruelty in mothers. It is somehow in our minds more unnatural, more wicked, more deviant that fathers being cruel. But there is no evidence that women abuse children more - yet we focus on them as a source of evil. Biblically, and in Fairy Tales women are…

I came back from the doctor and said I probably couldn't get pregnant without a lot of help - help I've decided I didn't want. He hugged me, said it was OK, and asked me to marry him. Right there, in the hallway, with a litter box not 2 feet away. I said no.

u comfy there in ur armchair bro?

I'm sure you have enough muscle from patting yourself on the back. No one is judging committed atheletes, but not everyone has the time or will to be one.

The high road is far overrated. Slumming is fun!

Except so much of the abuse endured from a narcissist is that your voice is stomped out. You are silenced repeatedly, because their word is always the most important. It is healing and therapeutic to reclaim your voice, and at first, it can be raw and abrasive. Because of course it is— they haven't had the privilege…

I'm going to stop defending my choices to assholes and just start using the simple but brilliant sign off "because fuck you that's why."