At the very least, Patrick Stewart will be excellent. So there’s that?

Yeah, I feel like “women are people and deserve rights and autonomy” is a lesson that needs to be taught fairly early...

I literally grew up in a three bedroom three bath on the Upper East Side of Manhattan and my parents made slightly less than that (adjusting for inflation kind of screws everything up). They own their apartment. They saved and bought it. Like people do everywhere. And no they did not work in finance.

It’s not used. It’s just this creepy thing men (and now women!) have to do when we turn 18. I had totally forgotten about it actually, until my girlfriend—who is slightly younger than I am and I guess might have to sign up now—expressed alarm when reading the paper yesterday. 

Ditto food poisoning. 

Out of curiosity, what kind of exercise are you doing? Or does this happen regardless of what kind of exercise you do? 

Someone once barfed while I was going down on them. :(

I’m not usually one for shitting in public, but I fully plan to make an exception for Trump’s grave.

A VPI Classic SE—a VERY expensive turntable. (Well, very expensive for me.) I had just turned 30 and finally had a little scratch and just said fuck it. It was the first purchase that was nice enough to justify having insured—my whole hifi setup is insured now, though it’s the most expensive thing I’ve got—and I…

Don’t apologize! She’s an evil person and it’d be a nice thing if only bad things happened to her. 

Take your star and go. 

The NYRB often publishes essays and articles that aren’t book reviews. It’s (generally...) an outstanding publication.

Your mattress. You spend a third of your life in bed. It should be a good one. Bad sleep can totally fuck up your life  

He looks like Moe Szyslak from the Simpsons...

It’s not body shaming to point out their incredibly creepy eyes. 

He must. Remember the whole “United Shtatesh” thing a little while back? His dentures were slipping. 

The Pentagon doesn’t want this fucking parade. I have faith that they can drag their feet on this enough to make sure it never happens.*

Didn’t the pope step in recently to be like “Feeding your baby in church is pretty obviously ok”?

The KRAMER by ZWILLING EUROLINE Carbon Collection 10” Chef’s knife is hands down the best chef’s knife I have ever used. It’s expensive as hell, and carbon steel requires actually cleaning and drying your knife, but it gets impossibly sharp, keeps an incredible edge, is perfectly balanced, and is simply a joy to use.…

The KRAMER by ZWILLING EUROLINE Carbon Collection 10” Chef’s knife is hands down the best chef’s knife I have ever…

Degenerate is a perfect way to describe it. It’s all so vulgar and lazy.