This was such an obvious case of sarcasm that it’s genuinely amazing y’all thought the author was serious. And that’s coming from someone who thinks 90% of articles on this site are beyond stupid.

“The plane went around and performed a belly landing. It was executed perfectly...”

Jalopnik really is garbage now. This is just... PDR. WTF even is this content?

I... don't have that issue? Then again I have enough self control to not blindly impulse-buy garbage off Amazon...

How odd!

I’ll take a stab an answering your question.

So first off, yes, for most folks it is an aesthetic thing. I don’t think that’s any reason to fault it. Surely aesthetics have played into automotive purchase you’ve made. You might not have liked how a certain car looked. You might have chosen X wheels instead of Y wheels…

That isn’t a lowering problem. It only rides like crap if you put crap parts on it. Next time, don’t buy bargain-basement parts and you won’t have that issue. You can lower a vehicle AND maintain an OEM-like ride if you do it PROPERLY.

It definitely isn’t a nothing-burger, and I know the camera angle doesn’t help, but looking at it, it doesn’t seem like anything my lowered BRZ would have any issue with. In 10 years I’ve only encountered one speed bump I scraped on, and it was an absolutely absurd one (and also only about 6 inches wide, so it was…

Can you share the street and intersection so we can all check out this massive speed bump on Street View? Curious how big it is.

All of those things exist by me, and none have been an issue for my lowered car. People tend to overestimate how much ride height you actually need in daily driving. A tiny bit of common sense goes a long way - things like not overhanging curbs with your bumper (which is a bad idea even in a stock height vehicle.)

There is a segment of automotive enthusiasts that will utterly shit on anyone for lowering their vehicle even a tiny bit, but there is nothing wrong with a mild, reasonable drop, IMHO. I’ve owned my BRZ for over a decade now. It’s been lowered for 8 years. Even with a front lip, the lowered ride height here in Chicago…

There really is nothing wrong with a mild drop when done correctly...

Meh. Personally I’m holding out for the 2025 Mercedes-AMG GT63 S E Performance 4-Door 6-Window Pan-America Limited GT-S Dual-Mode Superleggera 4x4² CSR Special Edition.

This car, in yellow, was my JAM in Midtown Madness 2.

Lane Departure Warning isn't annoying if you aren't a shit driver.

Hyundai’s designs are awesome. You suck.

Nah. What you need is THIS!

Damn. I’m about to buy my first motorcycle. How do I fast-track my status as an automotive journalist??? Lol.

Wait... so you get to ride press bikes for several months?

That's less worrisome from a sanitation perspective, and more worrisome from a "what important wires is he chewing on" perspective.