Medill?

Well, as much as we like to deny that our fanbase has as many dipshits as all the other teams, every shithead we grew up with in Pittsburgh is also a Steeler fan.

Doubtful. Once the offense realized your weakness, they'd simply hold on to the puck until getting close enough to the net to ram it right on in, tanking your save percentage because it would be entirely high-quality chances. Are you really going to be out there grabbing rebounds from a 200-pound NHL player?

NHL-goalie guy is as bad as that asshole who argued that he could be a MLB pitcher several Funbags ago. A .100 save percentage would be a HUGE accomplishment for some jagoff from the Internet.

Chamillionaire said the same thing, and that he was impressed with Al's rapping.

=VLOOKUP(OldBeigeGuy,"YYYY") + 1

My wife and I are getting the process underway!

Saddest irony of this line of thinking: If you're conscientious and empathetic enough to ask "should I bring a child into this shithole?" you're exactly the type of parent who would make it less of a shithole.

Spot on for my top-ranked college as well: there were only a few gunners and everyone made fun of them. I got in with parents who told me "A 3.0 GPA is great!" Do you know how easy it is to get a 3.0 with grade inflation?

Even your description of brilliant individuals is wrong. Every genius professor has lab assistants, Thomas Edison had an entire company, Henry Ford had people to design the assembly line. Even taking away those assistants, everything those people did was based in some way on prior work. Your genius Isaac Newton said…

"This Is Spinal Tap" but about early '90s rappers.

Probably should start by taking Andrew Jackson off the $20 bill.

Did you Columbus those first two sentences from "Fear of a Black Hat"? Because that is great.

A friend of a friend was one of the founders of Zico, and that's exactly how Zico got started, right down to the Brazil part.

Indian-style Chinese food is hugely popular in India, so acting like only white people can find a taste they like and tweak it is ridiculous. This is how cuisine develops in every culture on Earth.

"Don't Stand" isn't particularly morose, but it's so creepy I can't even listen to it.

Forest porn was a truly vital resource.

Really? It's doable: I not only remembered beating it as a kid without the code, I went back and did it again just a year ago.

Is there really a panic? That was exactly two hack writers. The vast bulk of commentary I see says she looked hot as hell. (Including my own commentary.)

Tommy Craggs and Sam Eifling? Deadspin turned into the fall quarter 2000 Daily Northwestern so gradually that I didn't even notice.