Wait, what? I thought Alyssa liked by all genders.

Your suggestion was not only that patriotism is dumb, but that anyone who would join the military for patriotic reasons is equally dumb as their only sacrifice would be for "the ultra wealthy". Congratulations, your views on international relations are now at a bratty 9th-grader's level.

Fair point. Example for your baffling-male-drool quotient: Jennifer Love Hewitt. We drool; women don't get it.

I'm a straight dude, so can one of you explain this guy's appeal to me, beyond his having the most British name in history? Clooney and Elba, I totally get it. Cumberbatch? He seems really average-looking and plays a very convincing asshole in most of his roles, so I find the frenzy really puzzling.

Indeed. I almost did in Bolivia, at least, before I figured out what's what.

It was pretty gross the first time I encountered it in Bolivia, but I got used to it pretty quickly. Most of the trashcans had those swinging lids so you didn't have to look at everyone's post-shit material. I also noticed that colored (usually pink or blue) TP was pretty popular: it hides the brown more effectively.

In fairness, your chances of ever going doing more than 35 or so in Indian traffic are pretty slim.

I hadn't thought of it that way, but that makes a lot of sense.

Once you figure out a 5K is 3.1 miles, it's pretty easy to do the math. But yeah, you have to learn that first.

What? I have never encountered this running 10Ks - they just stop putting markers after mile 6, considering you can usually see the finish line. I think you just had a really weird race organizer.

Forest porn was definitely a thing where I grew up. Does this change by climate? Is there also desert porn, swamp porn and tundra porn? I'm guessing yes.

That dude is wrong, but so is your response. If you don't love your country you should work to make it into something that you do love. "Love it or leave it" is the most un-American concept there is.

You should try taking your theory of borderless humanity on a tour of Pakistan sometime and see how well it goes.

I don't get this either, but I think it's irrelevant which non-American army you join - if you grew up here, why would you go off and fight somewhere else? This isn't WWII where you're joining the RAF to fight Nazi tyranny because the USA hasn't gotten in yet. The whole thing is really weird and disdainful of the…

I not only kept a picture frame my ex-girlfriend gave me, but later took out her photo and put in a picture of my new girlfriend, who is now my wife. I still have the frame on my desk at work. I mean shit, it's a nice frame.

Best marinade for baking: olive oil and Tony Chachere's Cajun seasoning.

On that note, have you seen the "is that a selfie of hot dogs or legs?" tumblr?

Good to hear. Always remember: intervals!

I can eat Domino's or Pizza Hut and not hate it. Though those two tend toward the more expensive cheap-ass pizza.

This article has already been written a bunch of times, but Big Wedding is so powerful these days that low-level, reason-based attacks just plink harmlessly off its buttercream fondant armor. Good luck to you in the resistance, but watch out for saboteurs among the mothers and aunts.