Anyone dumb enough to register for that site with the same email as their Facebook profile deserves to get busted.

It goes back to when servents helped dress aristocrats. Men would typically button their own shirts, and since most people are right-handed, the buttons are on the right side. Women, however, often required a couple people to help them get clothed, and that involved servents doing the buttoning/lacing. Again, since…

It bothers me that the buttons are on the wrong side from where they would be on an actual ladies’ pantsuit jacket. Thanks again patriarchy.

God, I miss the days when I could see these guys in Louisville for $10 at a dive bar. Happy for their success, but it’s bittersweet.

This has been dominating my playlist for a month. It’s the first time a Jason Derulo song has really gotten in my head, and I’m admittedly a sucker for 80’s-style synth beats. As much as he might fancy himself Michael Jackson, he’s definitely chaneling Whitney Houston here.

When I was 14, I ordered a “Japanese quesadilla” from a restaurant. It was served with a glob of (what I thought was) guacamole on the side that I dipped my first bite into. That was the first time I ever had wasabi.

Damn. Even Ric Flair would call that a cheap shot.

This just made my day. So happy for you two weirdos!

The first thing I notice in Knoxville is orange, orange everywhere. The University of Tennessee colors and logos adorn everything from people to pets to the entire front window of a residential home.

Zees is buollsheet. Svedeesh Cheff is a nuomber oune-a. Bork Bork Bork!

1:20 would make a pretty great gif that would look like him just tossing her onto the ground.

Jerry Bruckheimer spoke at ours and didn’t even tell any awesome The Rock or Pirates of the Caribbean stories. I feel like he at least could have taken the stage to Top Gun music. So disappointing.

It’s weird how poorly filthy-rich dudes so often dress. It’s usually because they’re tightwads who buy suits from Men’s Warehouse three at a time.

I imagine my feelings towards EDM are how people’s grandparents felt when Elvis first made it big. I just don’t get it.

Even the best rollercoasters end back where they started. It’s the experience that makes them worthwhile.

I mean, maybe I’m the rube for buying into these fictional characters and stories so hard for most of the last decade, but goddamned if my first thought after reading this post is that it isn’t funny and you’re really missing out.

Not a coincidence it’s called Roe v. Wade. The season these fish are having is an abortion.

As a Tennessee fan, I’m just glad we already have the Power T as a definitive logo that (I hope to God) won’t change.

Da ba dee da ba DIE