I use "dun wet ma britches" a lot.

What is this io9? I f'd your ma last night, nerd.

And then I said "I'd rather have Khalil Gibran than you on my team."

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There are some teenagers that physically look fuckable to me, but everything about them besides that seems so young and different compared to me that they might as well be an alien species.

...this other survivor of the cataclysmic event was an attractive female your age...

Yeah, your girl is definitely low-class. Figures you'd like her, as your momma is too.

Does anybody know how big Coco Crisp's dick is?

Do it in the evening gowns.

I miss nothing from birth (well, one month, he's adopted) to around three. My son is six, and I love being a dad now (yes, partly because of the time after 8 when he's asleep), but I get just the tiniest bit sad when I see him looking so grown up and look at the clothes that don't fit him anymore. I will never miss…

Believing in a right to choose does not preclude thinking a person has a shitty reason to choose. I believe in freedom of speech but it doesn't mean I can't personally judge the Westboro Baptist Church to be a bunch of assholes.

Barbasol has taken the bold move of putting on an aluminum bottom.

Barbasol has taken the bold move of putting on an aluminum bottom.

If it's ass wars, I'm a hawk.

Could be a very simple filter. It's spelled with a 1, not an I.

One S was already taken. So was N-word with an I not a 1. Dude was determined.

Portrait You bears an unexpected resemblance to (1) Count Dracula (2) Emperor Hirohito or (3) Hosni Mubarak.

When are we sending that probe to Uranus?

2005: Bubba Sparxxx finds Ms. New Booty.

I have a lump in my throat just reading it.