One time I looked out my window to see my neighbor unloading groceries from the back of his SUV onto my car hood! Car was nothing special but I kept it immaculate, the guy saw me washing and waxing it all the time. They were nice people and helped us out so I never said anything. To this day I’d love to know what the…

My wife was sitting in our car in a parking lot once because our kid was sleeping. A woman in a nice European import pulled up next to her and whacked our door with hers, and gave exactly zero fucks when my wife confronted her. She’s lucky my kid was sleeping because Mrs. Soulless is CRAZY.

We had a minivan as an everyday driver for years and it was a magnet for destruction. Door dings, flat-out hit-and-runs, landscaper damage, scrapes... one time we were sitting in it after a ballgame and a guy misjudged and bounced off the back driver’s corner shearing off most of the paint. I told him not to worry…

Happens to me all the time when I am not careful with one of my everyday cars. Constantly finding dings. I am not gonna take a bat to anyone’s car, but a giant seasonal-allergy-inspired loogie will frequently find its way onto the windshield of a jerk who parks too close to me.

A nice fuck you under the wiper would have been better, and accomplished the same thing.

The funniest thing is that this entire situation was unnecessary. The OP could have taken the very first spot in the row adjacent to the grassy patch, and parked as close to the left of it as possible. This is what I do all the time, and my car is a hell of a lot nicer (and harder to get replacement parts for) than…

This may be ridiculous given the website I am reading, but I find all the casual talk of penis removal a bit disconcerting. This is probably not a very nice man and maybe he somehow thought he could string this girl along as his long-distance side-piece. Or (more likely) he had a vague relationship with a clearly…

He makes ethnic jokes where occasionally the white guy isn’t the butt! Buuuurn him!!!

Between them replacing Peter Parker and now all of this hoo-hah, maybe I’ll just get a subscription to Silver Surfer and otherwise just go back and re-read all my old dead tree collection. I’ll save a fortune and Lord knows I already have enough comics.

Silver Surfer is self-contained, hilarious, exciting, and fun; and it features Marvel’s second greatest creation after Peter Parker. Why isn’t EVERYONE reading this?!

So, white = boring and black = cool.

When the Miles story hit the Daily News Sunday, I had a houseful of Father’s Day guests peppering me with questions about what was going on. I started going into alternate universes, and now they are collapsing together, and they all looked at me like I was a moron for reading this stuff. No one was interested in a…

I don’t mind re-casting every 10 years or so (except Jonah because Simmons was the literal human embodiment of JJJ) because no one wants 40-year-old Tobey McGuire limping around. And new cast generates interest. Just... stop with the origin re-telling. Everyone on earth knows Pete’s story, and if they don’t they can…

I am old and therefore not in their target demographic but yeah - what the hell is NBC doing? Other than Hannibal, the only NBC program I watch is Grimm. And that includes Sunday Night Football - who the hell needs 12 hours of football every week?

The laws on this are insane. They set artificially low BAL levels and have cops sit outside restaurants to hassle some poor bastard who had two glasses of wine with dinner and is perfectly capable of driving home - hundreds in fines, maybe steal his car in civil forfeiture. Then when some moron runs over a pedestrian…

Yeah, they thought they were so smart with that one. Gosh, it hasn’t been easy...

I am irresistable.

As a fan of them, you are greatly underestimating the entertainment value in hacking the Mets, particularly if you can get back into the archives a couple of years. Just imagine:

Yeah, we had that happen 20 years ago. Wife picks up the phone, it’s a collect call from some town we never heard of in Florida. She accepts because she has no brains has relatives in FL and thinks maybe it’s one of them. It’s some idiot who starts talking to her, won’t say who he is or what he wants, so she hangs up.…

Baseball is engaging, there are endless levels of strategy and continuity, and the more you are involved with a team the more angles and variables and things there are to consider.