Only in America can magnetic toys and Kinder Surprise be considered dangerous enough to ban, but not guns.

well, you don’t have to eat the entire barrel...

Everyone remember to search and replace “kid” with “pet.” All of this applies to your pup too. 

If there’s anything that my years in medicine have taught me, it’s that the answer to the question of “is my kid dumb enough to do [insert dumb idea here]?” is always an emphatic “fuck yes.” 

Spokesperson Phillip Fry?

I firmly believe that the world would be a much easier place if we simply legalized and recognized sex work as a legitimate and non-stigmatized industry.

At what point is it more cost effective to just buy a prostitute? This isn’t even a sure thing; you’re paying a lot for the chance to have sex. What is the intersection point on the rich/horny scale where you have enough money to pay for sex, but not enough to be attractive to gold diggers.

This is why you’re shadowbanned.

He voiced Mario in Mario teaches typing. While that came out in 92, he recorded the lines in 91.

I don’t know, it seems newer manuals don’t have full page diagram picture of the dashboard anymore (as well as the engine and fuse boxes too) so you could see the location of the unknown indicator to learn what it is. Now, you have to flip through 20 pages of individually-listed indicator lights or maybe even try to…

I’ll take that bet.

I’m old enough to remember when reading the “fucking manual” was the only means of identifying the indicators (what few there were), because the internet-in-its-present-form existed only in the pages of science-fiction magazines. I was also blessed in that every vehicle my family owned, even used…

What the hell are you on about?

Your comment doesn’t make sense, what are you trying to say?

Good luck with that........might be able to make it work as an enterprise product but most people value their wallet more than their privacy, especially when they think their are adequate (note I am not saying better) free alternatives.

Your friend sounds toxic as hell.

Can Will Smith slap someone again so we don't have to hear about Kim and Pete for a week?

This. Is. Ridiculous.

I guess my house must either have a lot more natural light than yours, or you have much more efficient window coverings, as I don’t see it working in my situation. 

My dad was arrested for “verbally objecting calmly.” Fuck the police, fuck the police unions protecting them, and fuck the idea that anything other than complete submission is going to appease a cop on a power trip.

I guess your options are to stick with a soulless corporation that actively funds and distributes misinformation, or a soulless corporation that doesn’t. Let’s not pretend there aren’t degrees of separation by lumping them all together.