Oprah is a woo-peddling new-agey crackpot. She also unleashed Dr. Phil on the universe. Screw her.

Whoa whoa whoa.... Are you telling me that when I tell someone to go eat a bag of dicks, I can give them an address where to go do it? I've been given the greatest of gifts today.

I was a food runner in a larger restaurant during school. Once, an older woman tried to order a glass of "man-aggie A troys" from me. I somehow kept a straight face and told her I would give her order to her server.

I believe this couple here was the first couple:

this is funnier.

AND THAT'S HOW TILDA SWINTON WAS BORN.

When X returned

You should have gone to the bathroom and said "I'll send you something too", then sent him a picture of a bigger dick.

Dealbreaker. Shut it down.

The reviews on the site are amazing, especially this one:

In all seriousness, though, this is the kind of marriage I want. They sound hilarious.

appropriate

This is what happened to the Autoblow1.

Relevant.

I didn't learn I was mildly colorblind until I went to a different optometrist a few years back. They did they test with the green and red circles and while I can tell there are different colors going on, I couldn't see the what characters were there. Mine is mild though...bright red and greens I can see fine, but as…

At first I was agreeing with you. Then I thought.. hmm. Was it REALLY necessary to accentuate curves on these female scientists, considering the fact they have makeup on and female hair for the most part? Do lady scientists wearing hip hugging lab coats? I dunno. Were they afraid the consumer might be gender…

Feminists won't be satisfied until college students routinely exchange waivers before making out.

Some people just want to be outraged.

There's just no fucking pleasing you, is there?

"ESPN: This group of SNL cast members is widely considered the worst they've ever had..."