I don’t know about an apocalypse.

The president of the United States is a demonstrable threat to the security of the United States.

His excuse, per CNN, was “I have the absolute right to declassify anything.”

He’s right, of course. The President is the final word on what is/is not released from classified materials.

The problem is that his engagement with this issue is going to start and stop with a Bronx-accented Prince Adam screaming “I HAVE THE…

You have to be fucking kidding me.

“That’s not like him...” they say.

I get the parent’s grief. But blaming some locker room attendant for running out to score him some drugs and not Skagg’s himself is some next level denial. His death is indeed tragic and I wish he got some help, but it was his decision to make this fatal mistake. Jamming up some underling is bullshit.

I can envision trump trying to drink your milkshake, but failing due to lack of draaaaaaiinage.

7th grade basketball. A few seconds left, we are up by one or two. Our ball out of bounds. During timeout, coach tells us all we have to do is get the ball inbounds and don’t travel. The ball is inbounded to me, and I grasp it firmly.

“I don’t think he did anything wrong, in fact it sounds like this is all her fault”  Dave Chappelle

Police were able to easily apprehend Cousins, who apparently blew out both knees and Achilles on his way to take the shot.

“the recording was made last Friday, when she and her son were at a trampoline park.”

That and the whiskey.

You’re still buying the game, you’re still supporting this shit.

Rogan is that you?

Nothing defeats the windmill!

I hope that NFL players take note of the lack of empathy people have shown Andrew Luck during this entire process. Don’t feel guilty about hold-outs for more money. Get as much money as you can and get the hell out before it becomes a detriment to your health. 

What a shame. He died before he achieved his lifelong dream of [checks notes] being even fucking richer.

Dog dish of dough filled with Prego

Not every Jew is (gasp!) even a Zionist or a supporter of Israel in the first place!

“Everyone liked that”