So, your kids are learning about creationism and that evolution is just a competing theory?

I don’t really disagree, but I doubt there will ever be another death penalty in major college sports. The money is just too big. Unfortunately, that means some big time athletes who have had their asses kissed since they were 9 years old know they can get away with pretty much anything.

I dont know how this isnt national news, on ESPN, etc. Im also shocked that Baylor and Penn State havent gotten the death penalty. Fuck those ass holes.

Update (10:15 p.m. ET): Now, more than three hours after the game was scheduled to begin, they’re finally getting things underway. Some delightful tidbits:

Seriously dude, go blow a goat. Even if it wasn’t included (which it was) calm the hell down and shotgun an Iron City you yinzer.

Those neighbors are awfully righteous for people whose fences are made out of dildos.

I assume the one-shouldered togas and off-shoulder flouncy numbers Ivanka and Melanoma favor for official state business will be exempt — for them. The rest of us better be prepared to rock out in our supafresh Christian burkas. And by rock out, I mean breed.

How come women can’t go sleeveless when Paul Ryan is allowed to go spineless?

Praise be motherfuckers.

Yeah, and it’s worth considering how fluky Golden State’s situation is: They only signed Curry to such a below-market deal because there was legitimate fear that his then-chronic ankle problems might prevent him from having an NBA career, and then he not only shook off those ankle problems but turned into one of the…

This is an indirect consequence of the salary cap and max-salary system, which tends to flatten the actual, on-paper contract differences between competing free-agency bids for most players.

Only tangentially related, but those American flag-inspired jerseys are the most clownish things I’ve seen on a baseball field. The stars in the typography look like polka dots from afar. Yeesh.

Fun fact: each of these shitty row house in Bed-Stuy is worth more than your typical red state township.

The rest of the car would almost certainly look like fried hell at 187k miles. I’m inclined to believe that 87k is legit.

One the one hand, this is the historically significant precursor to the Subaru Outback etc. On the other hand, I hate the Subaru Outback. This car has a lot to answer for. CP

Take my money, and I’m leaving on the Willie Nelson for President bumper sticker.

It’s got a cop motor, a 440 cubic inch plant, it’s got cop tires, cop suspensions, cop shocks. It’s a model made before catalytic converters so it’ll run good on regular gas.

Bullshit. No, correction: fucking bullshit.

I’m just assuming “Florida” in the absence of any other information.