They're not really "Boning" him until a Cardinal fan says so. Sorry baseball world, it's their game and we're all just along for the ride.

Niners > Sixers

(Not Zlatan, though. He knows the way to get by without being good: play at half-speed, don’t overextend yourself, and only shoot when you know you’ll score. Smart man.)

Isn't going bankrupt, the very essence of being "broke"?

They’re not really jerks until the Cardinals say they’re jerks.

Man, give the guy a break. He was really hungover and couldn't find his suit!!

I’m so sick of getting shit on, for things out of my control!!!!!

“What Happens When Someone Dies During The Hot Dog Eating Contest?”

During the MLS Playoffs?!?!?!?!

This is reckless!!! And brilliant. You're done for the day with your fancy +1

Uhhh...fucking spellcheck!! Sorry folks, it’s fixed.

Shiver me timbers!! Now I know why they're called pirates.

Someone is clearly tired of using his hands.

There’s Country (shit) and Outlaw Country (the shit)

Fuck right off will always make me giggle Because really, I'm a child in a mans body.

Wrigley Field: Where shitting on your fans happens.

Best pitching match-up of the week??????????

I was actually embarrassed for this mans behavior, until you felt the need to defend this guy. Now I'm embarrassed for you. Sleep tight simpleton.

Wait?!?! Kirk Gibson is a Rocket???