I bet when he was living there this guy was probably raised in the lopsided “better-than-the-brown-ones” ideals and greed that fucked up Mexico which in turn is the reason why they are here.

Yeah in his article he insinuates that the ability to speak Spanish in the US is somehow sinister, but then in his “clarifying tweet thread” he’s like wait, I speak Spanish, I can’t be a racist!

His father was from Mexico... where he was the VP of a large chemical company, that allowed him the means to ship young Bret off to an elite boarding school in Massachusetts. You know, standard immigrant story.

Stephens also condemns the Democrats for speaking Spanish with an American accent. Because ordinary, decent Americans like ‘us’ don’t speak Spanish because we’re not smug elitists, but also we speak it fluently with a Mexican accent and if you don’t then you’re a pathetic peasant.

Fwiw, my late father was from Mexico. My mother was a refugee. I grew up in the D.F. I speak Spanish.

Also notice how he singles out *Soledad* O’Brien. Subtle.

Finding a black friend is too much work, now they’re their own black friend.

Everyone here is just one job change/neighborhood move/divorce away from losing their entire friend group.

If Kenan Thompson was actually Steve Harvey then I would like Steve Harvey

The best part of living in a fireworks restricted state? Being with a guy who drops eight grand on fireworks just across the border and comes back home. When the state trooper asked for the usual set of paperwork, a permit for transporting fireworks within the state was included. Watching the smile drop off the…

Aren’t the temporary ones all in shipping containers these days? Ours are. 

I had to scroll down to find fireworks. When my family took road trips, states with fireworks stores were the coolest thing. Like, this town doesn't have a gas station or restaurant but has a 5000 square foot firework superstore? Okay! 

Yeah, but what do they put on their water tower?

Definitely true in South Carolina. Although I swear on road trips I’ve driven out of a “dry” state and stopped at a fireworks stand on the other side of a state line and found nothing but glow sticks, LED flashlights and *maybe* wooden matches.

Makes me pine for the drive to Fillmore in CA just to pick up roadside fireworks with enough firepower to put me on a FBI watch list.

If you just crossed a state line and there’s a fireworks shop within 500'—they sell the good stuff.

Yes, and you can always tell which states have restrictive fireworks laws by how many of those things are .00001 miles away from the state border

The only real use for the depressingly libertarian states is I can come home from one of them with enough high explosive to level my entire neighborhood.

Yes! Plus you have no idea how strict state laws are until you stop. So maybe you find out that for the next six hours of driving you can’t buy anything more than sparklers and snakes — or maybe bottle rockets are legal! Adds some excitement to crossing state lines.

Ortiz was shot “in an amusement center” ... Ortiz was shot in the leg