I’ve done Murph a couple times (no vest), and I think my best time ever was around 55 minutes. For comparison, I can run a mile in 5:30, two miles at 13:00 without feeling particularly winded, rock climb regularly at V4s pushing to V5s, and oh yeah, I played in the fucking NFL.

“...but at the same time I had a broken ankle. I won a championship with you and you don’t even really call me. I’ve got to beg you to call me. My agent has to beg you to call me ... My ankle was broke. My ankle was broke. And they’re shooting me up, shooting me up, shooting me up every day to play. My ankle was…

#1 is refried beans made with honest-to-goodness real LARD by someone’s abuelita or tia.

The weird thing is if you ranked the 100 best jellybeans being hit by a truck would probably come in at #50.

Keep Chip Foose out of it. The world needs less two-tone cars with orange pinstripes.

Good news is Edd seems to be doing okay in his new life.

Nah, he had an Aisin 5-speed overnighted from Japan when his motor hydrolocked.

Do not walk, run, run far away from this car.

“I try to pretend the football teams are elves and orcs.”

The best response to Russo calling all wrestling fans gay comes from, as one might expect, Jim Cornette. Corny said that this likely stems from Russo’s lack of success with either men or women. Furthermore, Cornette said that all that’s left for Russo are inflatable sheep, “because even a self-respecting living sheep…

What about Anal Roberts? What are their recruiting policies?

Stone Cold broke into Brian Pillman’s house and Pillman fired a gun at him. That was in 1998.

Incredibly angry, thanks for asking!

These useless chucklefucks. Just look at this smarmy little dipshit.

How were you not scared forever having seen your grandma put pom-poms on her rack?

Crap is crap even if it’s a decent price for said crap. Don’t know if I would take one for free. CP.

But Kool Moe Dee did rap about this car, so you could rock his tape in the Becker while trolling for hot, 50 YO 80s chicks. “I’m drivin’ Benz 190; 2.5 and you know where to find me. Drivin’ down the highway, girlies behind me....”

Is it tiring having to couch every fucking thing in terms of liberals vs conservatives?

So you use your toothbrushes for cutting things instead of cleaning your teeth. Well, I reckon that explains it.

This being the UK, where guns are harder to come by, we actually hacked our dick off with a sharpened toothbrush.

I could NEVER drive deadlip’s hooptie.