Call me crazy, but I actually feel bad for Luis. This has got to be tough to chew on.

They're rentals. #hertzworldproblems

As Germany should know, the US doesn't let a little water stop them from advancing.

Boss looks good. He turns 65 this September. He's eight months younger than Gregg Popovich.

Tim Lincecum Goes to White Castle

Oh, look at mister big fuckin' tough guy baseball coach. Real tough guy. Woop-dee fuckin' doo. Made it to the big time, didn't you, mister woo-eee tough baseball man? Well howdy fuckin' woop-doo wooey-doo. Don't feel so tough now do you, mister howdy woop-whoa hooey yooey howdy-doo fuckin' woop-doo hooey-whoo doo-op…

2, 2, 2, 2, 2, 2, 2, 2, 2, 2, 2, 3, 2, 2, 2, 2

Calling these kids "stupid motherfuckers" is wildly inappropriate when it's obvious that they are actually "giant idiot pussy bitch cocksuckers."

What team were they all drafted by?

The game in 1982 remains the first and only time that Germans have turned anything into a joke.

Not surprised Stepanek knows his way around a white line, oh, what's that, you didn't know he's a coke head who was responsible for the failed drug test of then girlfriend Martina Hingis and her subsequent spiral down the world rankings before an early retirement from the sport. Don't let this take away from the fact…

Fuck your Reese's pieces. And fuck E.T. too!

Onazi: OHNOOHNOOHNO

1. Green

Fartolo Colon How are your ribs?

Something tells me this isn't the first blockage his chest has experienced.

Getting shelled by an American seems more like Joe Middle-East's gig.

If they really wanted to capture the feel of ESPN in 1985, they'd have called their venture 120 Jorts.

Well, let's hope it's better than that hilariously bad redesign of their website that went live this week and broke everything.