You kind of have to hand it to the guy. My toilet training has been so successful that I don’t think I could voluntarily shit my pants even if someone were holding a gun to my head.

Maybe replace the banner photo with something frozen and ultra-processed. That burger actually looks pretty fresh and unprocessed — freshly ground beef, baked bun, lettuce and tomatoes. Well, the cheese is processed, but American cheese is best for a burger anyway.

If someone I don’t know asks for me, I always reply with “Who’s calling?” Or “Who’s this?” if I’m feeling less polite at the moment. Or “How the fuck did you get this number?” if they inspire warlike tendencies in me.

Petitions are stupid and useless. People who sign them are stupid and useless. The people who signed this one are particularly stupid and useless.

This is why my living will and end-of-life legal paperwork include a part that specifically forbids my mother from having any say in any aspect of my health care or end-of-life decisions, because she is a religious extremist, and if I were brain-dead she would, if she could, completely ignore my wishes, keep me hooked…

The dragons are a metaphor for nuclear weapons, and when I watched the destruction of King’s Landing I haven’t been so horrified by anything I’ve seen on television since the film “Threads.”

“When my dragons are grown, we will take back what was stolen from me and destroy those who have wronged me! We will lay waste to armies and burn cities to the ground!” — Daenerys Targaryen, season 2

She said back in season 2 that in revenge for the theft of her family’s throne she would lay waste to armies and burn cities to the ground. Cities are full of civilians.

Did y’all miss this in season 2? “This is the same woman who swore to the leaders of Qarth that, ‘when my dragons are grown, we will take back what was stolen from me and destroy those who have wronged me! We will lay waste to armies and burn cities to the ground!’” This has been foreshadowed since the first season.

Does no one understand foreshadowing, and how they’ve been foreshadowing this since Season 1? The last episode even depicted the Mad King’s caches of wildfire exploding around King’s Landing, tying her visually to her father. She did indeed have a destiny, and it was to be the Mad Queen. How many times did they have…

MINE. MINE. MINE MINE MINE. MINE.

If I were dating him, this would be a dealbreaker.

Ah. Unfortunately a number of insurance companies won’t cover it until you’re 60 (although mine does it at 50), but given how mindbogglingly awful shingles is I’d pay for it if I had to. (I think it’s about $200.) I have no idea if the shingles vaccine also falls under his religious extremism but if it does ... his…

There was a time not that long ago when the name Archie would have brought someone else to mind.

If they really wanted him to wear the crown they’d have called him Jughead.

All the Catlicks I grew up with got the damn vaccine.

However, you do remain, in fact, a dumbass.

Another close friend got shingles in her 50s, which broke out along a cranial nerve. She was actually paralyzed for 3 weeks, had to drag herself along the floor to go to the bathroom, and they were worried she might lose her sight.

If I recall correctly, he has at least a 25% chance of contracting shingles as an adult, which increases if he’s under any kind of stress, as stress can trigger it. One of my best friends got shingles when he was 28 when he was in a hugely stressful job situation.

I was raised Catholic, and found this entire scenario to be deeply fucked up since I was a child.