Finally he comes up, carrying a big box. He opens it up in front of all of us and tells the banquet manager that he looked all over and couldn’t find the lobster crackers, but he thinks that we could probably make do with the oyster crackers that he found.

Oh my god but that lip color though. Damn.

I wore purple eyeshadow once and I broke out in a horrible puffy rash around my eyes because some makeup manufacturers use a cheap red dye that I, apparently, am allergic to.

You know what’s really sad? These women don’t look “plus size” to me. They look like women I see every day. They look like me and the heaviest I’ve ever been is 170ish at 5’5.

Starbucks does have an iced cappuccino. It's basically an iced latte with steamed milk foam on top of the ice.

Starbucks iced cappuccino is an iced latte with steamed milk foam on top of the ice. Pretentious? Absolutely. Welcome to Starbucks.

Hey if you get 5 pieces of pumpernickel bread, do you have a pumperquarter?

I'm stealing that patriarchal knuckledraggers line. I like it.

My 32 DD's and I agree with you but also never ever ever bind with ace bandages or tape or anything like that. You can get really hurt. (that's my PSA for the day)

I'll check in again after my close tomorrow

That's exactly what I plan to do when I work tomorrow.

Resident barista here.

This is what they don't get and why corporate should get feedback from the baristas behind the counter. My manager literally said he doesn't care about holding up the line. I hope the morning shift had fun writing this on every cup with a line out the door.

Oh my god I work at a Starbucks.

Nah I can't do painted nails either, it just...looks wrong to me. It's so cute on other women though. I'll just use the excuse that I'm a mechanic and I'll never have nice hands.

Oh my god yes please

Haha I hadn't thought of that! I might've won then.

I was in a regional spelling bee in 5th grade and I got out on quesadilla. I spelled it with a "c" I think.

This is the best decision. You're doing great work here today.

I THOUGHT THE HEADLINE SAID SHOPPING FOR PORN!!!