This is fucking fabulous. I have never loved Deadspin more.

This is seriously awesome. You’re carrying on the Gawker Media tradition of doing smart, challenging, in your face work. Keep it up.

She used the “putting Trump in the White House” shaming of third party voters. That is disgusting. Samantha is smarter than that and knows better. The Democratic Party does not stand for my ideals. I will not support them for President. I will vote down-ticket for them, but I will either abstain from the President…

I’m not pithy enough to make a good joke about this, so I feel compelled to go the serious route.

This is the stupidest possible play in all of sports, and I love that it occurs with such regularity.

This strikes me as Bryan doing what he can, in the only fashion that he still can, to help another wrestler’s career. He is leveraging his own popularity to push Miz forward. Notice how his departure from the stage allows Miz to essentially cut a solo minute long promo and ask yourself how likely it is that you would…

I know it doesn’t sound likely but my guess would be Bryan’s been cleared and his first match back at some point will be against the Miz.

Came off as a worked-shoot to me. Probably given bullet points like the old days and ad-libbed it with some cold hard truth.

fun fact:

I hope this is sarcasm, but I think I’m wrong. If this is a real comment then dividing competitions into men’s and women’s is done for, which means women are done competing in sports.

BRO PEEING ON BUILDINGS AND STARTING FIGHTS AT AGE 32 IS JUST AN IMMATURE MISTAKE BRO

What was done to her was beyond unforgivable. But it wasn’t the porn’s fault; it was solely the fault of the evil waste of life who abducted her. Blaming porn is like blaming video games for Columbine.

I feel like a person whose introduction to porn was their rapist abductor kind of doesn't have the most level starting point for a conversation about the subject. But maybe that's just me.

So Lochte basically told the Cartman version of the story

She wasn’t “selected over qualifying lifters” she qualified under the very clear and predictable algorithm that decides who goes to the Olympics. And the algorithm was clearly accurate, since she medaled, and Maddie Rogers(or however you spell her name) would have gotten destroyed. Sorry the team is selected based on…

Which makes me wonder why they spend 90% of the memo talking about closing or tapping the hydrants illegally.

What about those of us that aren’t LGBTQ or Euro?

Rio is in the same hemisphere so the water drains the same as in Australia.

I get it, they don’t want controversy to distract viewers from compelling WNBA storylines like “Which two teams are these again?” and “Is that point guard the one I heard about in college in 2009? No? Ok nevermind.”

Putting it up for auction is exactly how these guys keep getting it back over and over.