Can we demand the Slack transcripts of the other potential headlines? There’s gotta be some gold in there...

Didn’t a “mile-high pile of ass” get Kobe into trouble once already? 

Dammit Denver, Ryan Adams told you it was going to be windy... https://www.rollingstone.com/music/news/watch-ryan-adams-deliver-weather-report-on-denver-tv-w521527

In the first game of a double header no less...

Any excuse to re-post this: http://gawker.com/lbj-was-obsessed-with-his-dick-1694599317

If you ever get the chance to have your friend win the Stanley Cup, I highly recommend it.

He had me at “cunt” but lost me at “should of”

Apparently his brother was in Hudson (my hometown) which is only 30 min from MSP. They picked up the other brother in EC and made the drive. I have several friends who were disappointed they weren’t on Twitter late last night. We’re a dedicated but strange fanbase.

Yeah but, cmon, even that would be kinda fun at this point right? Those Gardenhire Twins were at the very least entertaining. I mean, remember when Joe Mauer was a sure-fire 1st ballot HoF catcher? Morneau won an MVP!

Sure

I inherited a yellow ‘01 Ford Escape from my mom before moving to LA years ago. (They bought it basically b/c they needed the car and yellow was what they had on the lot at the time.)

Spicy. Thai.

I had no idea what Cavatappi was until I opened the Wikipedia article and actually found myself saying out loud “Oh fuck yeah” to no one in particular.

“I don’t know, it was ONE of those foreign golfers... Henrik Stenson? You tell me...”

Meanwhile, Joe Mixon contends the wall hit Beckham first and had it coming...

A middle-eastern Jew? He would’ve been laughed out of the primaries...

https://play.spotify.com/album/4g4YDJtWafxGP9jAmgCiCS Full EP if you wanna check it out, emailed tips@deadspin.com with a link to more of our covers. Most are actually pretty solid.

They’ve got two albums worth of similar covers, just put out the second one this fall: https://open.spotify.com/album/2FX0Zi76XTMJk8d8oHmRVV

Here’s not one, but TWO my company has done. Hate the trend, but it’s paying the bills.

EDIT: Lady in the top right is the crazy person who “never had an interest in politics” until Trump who was actually a state representative right? This one? http://theslot.jezebel.com/i-believe-donald-this-is-the-face-of-trumps-insane-sup-1747287184