SciFriedMyBrain

4/15/16

My dad decided to paint his closet door to match the bedroom walls. He put one stroke of blue paint at the top edge of the white door, got distracted by someone at the front door, and stopped painting. This happened when I was a baby. That single paint stroke stayed there until they repainted everything to sell the…

4/15/16

Silver lining - the overwhelming rightness you will enjoy for the rest of your life.

4/14/16

Omg the tall Bhutanese man’s expressions in the first two pics are hilarious.

4/14/16

Are you Laura Ingalls?

4/14/16

Kate’s try at the archery and dart throwing were hilarious.

4/14/16

I hate to generalize, but...

4/14/16

We had a half-tiled bathroom for 11 years. I win. My father finally let my Mum call in professionals when my sister got married and we realised that there might be a lot of people we need to impress coming upstairs in the house.

4/14/16

my dad has been remodeling the kitchen for five years.

4/14/16

5 surprising facts about dolphin sex from their love of eels to having bisexual tendencies

4/14/16

I’m going to imaginary hell, because I totally laughed, and then felt bad about it. Poor dolphin.

4/14/16

“I was trying to do everything I could to avoid this animal. She couldnwas insatiable. She called me repeatedly, told me she loved me. I came home and she’d lit candles and strewn flowers all over the room...

4/14/16

Yup.

4/14/16

Right? And “I didn’t want to be a zoophile. I was trying to do everything I could to avoid this animal”? How hard could it possibly be to avoid a fucking dolphin?! Just because an animal humps your leg does not mean it’s cool for you, a human, to have sex with it. That’s not how it works.

4/14/16

What the hell?
Does he just not know anyone grounded enough to say:
“Dude you REALLY REALLY shouldn’t be boning dolphins!”

4/14/16

It sounds like the Dolphin came on to him. In fact, a little investigating reveals that these Dolphins are out of control and that this is a widespread (ahem) problem.

4/14/16

I just love it when, after a lifetime of searching, a person finds their porpoise in life.

4/14/16

Why does this not have more stars. You are so, so right.

4/14/16

THIS IS THE MOST PERFECT COMMENT EVER AND ABSOLUTELY THE CASE!!!

4/14/16

Hoppiness makes me endlessly angry. Not everyone likes hops. Move on, beer people!

4/14/16

Also the only plausible reason no one why no one at the Daily Planet realizes their coworker is Superman.