You sound like a former victim.

100,000 MissiSsippies.

maaaaaaaaaan

+4.20

A Sodastream machine!

This would have made Ray Rice's weekend a little earlier.

How about we use a hockey penalty box? 10 minutes for tripping ? 5 for flopping?

Just about every name up there is a euphemism for "vagina".

maybe carbon fiber or titanium in there somewhere?

Maybe he missed the news on that particular day/month/year. Or was simply not aware that we have a NEW ONE!

I can only assume that there is a $5 bill stuffed in the tray.

Yes, 8.3 million Mongolian tugriks a year.

I just hope she isn't an accountant.

I would also accept a hot hatch version.

They should just go with an all black/olive green driver's helmet.

Yeah, Kinja can be pretty sketchy.... but a 5-10% success rate seems a tad ambitious.

A dollar for every touchdown he hasn't thrown.

Cumikaze

They look exactly the same... err.... "synchronized".