Lindsay, we’ve seen your parents. We get it.

“Do you like crystal meth and hemorrhoids? Have we got the job for you!”

I jumped ship because of the sketches. They felt like a waste of time.

Maddow

I gave up on it awhile ago. Now I'm disappointed in myself.

Cargo capris FTW.

LOL. During the AIDS awareness era of the mid 80s, I got my hands on a pamphlet and asked my mom what A-N-A-L sex was. I was maybe in second or third grade. That wasn't a conversation she was planning on.

That brush was a threat to national security. He was obviously keeping us safe.

I've had gum disease. Now I floss.

Chick flicks are almost always condescending.

I thought mania

It’s like you think you’re finally starting to get over him and then you see bae one more time.

I want The Nightly Show to be good so bad. But it's pretty hard to watch.

I got called once and I was the only person who was excited to be there. So naturally I wasn't picked.

I get this. Movies are a splurge for me too. I put off getting a haircut until next paycheck to see it in the theater.

One million yesses on the rhinestones

Also fringe and asymmetric hems

I’d read it

Most of my relatives are unrefined whites