“If there’s anything there for me, it’s a lesson learned that if you make any motion with either hand, that’s it.”

I believe Hulligan Moons is the name of Alfredo Aceves second son

A lot of white guys in Philly making asses of themselves around black dudes these days.

He should of named his son "Marinara" so they could be they spaghetti sauce men. Or he should have named his wife that.

What does Aceves mean in Spanish, does it mean the "spaghettis?" Dude, you're name literally means in Spanish Alfredo Spaghettis.

Well it's better than being named for after spaghetti sauce!

I don't know man, naming your kid after Apollo 1 seems pretty tasteless to me.

At first I thought it was a Boston Starbucks, but then realized the guy in the foreground isn't working on a powerpoint about slavery and all of its merits.

To avoid any future investigations, the academy just joined the SEC.

When asked how he was able to progress through the levels of training so fast, Mario said it was easy, he just jumped up to the top bricks and ran above everything until he found the secret pipes.

So - doesn't know the law, doesn't really care, just wants to run around with a badge and look important? Sounds exactly like a cop to me.

Man, if white people keep up all this racism, people are really going to start resenting us.

Who said Bostonians can't pronounce the hard R?

You make one ignorant, racist comment about Amistad on your iPhone and it Hounsou forever.

Like this guy's mom always said: when life gives you lemons, have a black guy make you lemonade.

Riley Cooper has some chunky ass fingers. Must make it tough to catch a football.

[inspects notebook]

P.P.S. Craziest thing happened when I touched this paper. All of a sudden it's no longer 14" tall! Guess I have that affect on shit.

He should have known something was up when the guard handed him a TMZ legal pad .

Ehlo probably wouldn't have resorted to reckless burning if his wife gave him a little more TLC.