Right, but normally he’d charge the money (which is fair and I wish people (not you, I’m not saying you) would understand that craft work is actually expensive and we’re not called freelancers because we don’t expect to get paid). This is clearly his business model, and he got suckered by a terrible person into not…

oops. We’ll miss ya.

There is no fucking way this level of work requires a 7-14 day turnaround like his website claims.

Could be worse - it could be like how they did in Victorian times, where they ACTUALLY took pictures of the dead person. It’s super-creepy when you realize the chair the dead kid is sitting on is ITS MOTHER UNDER A SHEET.

a Pennsylvania-based photographer who specializes in photoshopped portraits with deceased family members.

Okay, but were you like a good dunker or more of just I go up for a simple dunk on a fast break kind of dunker?

Also how tall are you?

you, um, use a lot of butter, my man.

Rub it on your belly and then take a nap in the sun. That’s what I do.

Bears. Beets. Battlestar Galactica.

Unless your office pool has a MTSU grad, I can’t imagine a scenario where every other person in an office pool didn’t also get royally fucked by that result.

... That’s me. I hate basketball but make it a point to watch my Spartans make their run every March. Now I don’t even plan on looking at my bracket again.

I don’t fill out a bracket - I just scan in my junior year pre-cal final because it’s pretty much the same amount of pulled-from-my-ass wrong guesses on the same page.

See? This is why I didn’t fill out a bracket. I would have said “Well MSU makes the Final Four a bunch. Might as well put them there.” Then I would have taken a day off from work and my whole afternoon would have been shit. I mean, I still took the day off from work, but at least I’m not flipping out over what some 19…

You’d have been mauled before you finished the word “helium.” By us, not the bears.

I played little league with Adam LaRoche for a year or two while his dad was the White Sox bullpen coach. They were decidedly not big on school or book learnin’ or doing much of anything except hitting baseballs and breathing with their mouths open.

So Leitch brought up an interesting point in his room temperature take:

You know you are getting old when you attempt this at the county fair to impress your unimpressed girlfriend and then you can’t comb your hair the next day. #RotatorCuffsMatter

Step one: DON’T PUT IT IN THE MICROWAVE, YOU DRIVELING HEATHEN.