"Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's ass" doesn't mean what Charles thinks it means...

"I was on my way to poundtown."

Apocalyptic Yogi Bear reign delayed by bad acting and awful script.

Worst shaking of Love since Debbie Gibson.

Hoge spelled backward is "Egoh," after all.

@Phintastic: Cam Newton hates happy trees.

"Michael Vick would like to get a dog."

"You need to be told you're headed straight for hell and you can't do one thing about it. Have a nice day!"

"married women don't do that sort of thing"

Shouldn't be long before LeBron's songs are "I Missed Again" and "I Don't Care Anymore."

The mixup happened because Ron Zook was supposed to do the ceremonial opening tip, and grabbed the wrong ball when he got distracted by something shiny.

@Eddie Murray Sparkles: I was always partial to Tiny Panzer.

@AzureTexan: *LeBron* "Oh Stewardess, I speak shuck and jive."

@FloriTexaYork: Should've gone with James Earl Jones instead. At least when we lost he would have given us a quality "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

So Qatar will be tearing the stadiums down after 2022 and giving them to poor countries...

Better than the alternative safety precaution, which was to sit Ronnie Woo Woo in the right field bleachers and have him yell "Wall... Wooo! Wall... Wooo!" the whole game.

@istealllamas: I can see the commercial now. "Illini Football: Hide your kids, hide your wife..."

Look out Cincinnati Reds clubhouse... naked Joe Morgan is moving in full time!

@Jack Edward's Hair Piece: If this was Kobe beef it would have done more than just licked his ass.

@Dr. Spaceman, Esq.: The same applies to their "basketball team" lately.