I bet some players' wives and girlfriends would appreciate those pink mouthguards.

"I swear to god, if you call the cops I'll throw myself down the depth chart."

Such a damn shame.

*picks up Stepfan Taylor in both FF leagues*

I was put on the Exempt/Commissioner's Permission List as a kid and I turned out just fine. My parents did it out of love.

Someone already mentioned this and he responded. The LAUSD does not currently have any of those less than lethal munitions....

The only way to stop a bad guy with a gun is a gym teacher with a grenade launcher.

It just fucking sucks that this guy of all people is effectively punished with a short timeout.

Done.

BREAKING: the NFL has hastily and retroactively promoted Cardinals linebacker John Abraham to executive.

Well that's just a whole bunch of sad right there. Sad because she thinks it's a ratings ploy, sad that she defends her husband, sad that it reminds me that even after everything that went down she made that man her husband, sad that it took the second video for this punishment to come down when the first was horrific…

No, he says, there's no comparison to be drawn between himself and Ray Rice.

Where's the white jacket, Ray?

Your intimate partner, who is significantly less physically powerful than you, open handed slaps you after you were clearly in their space during what appears to be an argument, and you respond by punching so hard *you knock them out*, you're an abusive asshole who pretty much deserves to lose your job.

"She was clearly provoking him. Women need to learn not to provoke men like that"

Still on sale, ladies:

Lacky: "Welker popped Molly"

A few minutes later, John From Cincinnati called, but no one could tell what the fuck he was talking about, so everyone changed the station.

Where do you work, Honda?

At this point in time, the Ohio National Guard is not considered to be a suspect.