FROM BEAUTIFUL MIAMI GARDENS, IT'S THE RUNNER UP CONSOLATION PRIZE BOWL!

Very sorry for your loss. You'll be happy to know your father made an awesome puppet.

What, you never played with a dead hobo body when you were a kid?

Smile? Why not? The the facial expression of a J.C. Penny catalog model enjoying a day at the beach is perfectly appropriate for a man sitting in a lawn chair he's strapped to a homemade missile along with some canvas wings held together by Tinker-Toys. Live a little! It's 1931, it isn't as if we're going to live past…

Interesting. I didn't realize there was a hypothesis that suggested climate change was a contributing factor to the Greek Dark Ages.

Okay, but just to be safe...

Eh, we live in a world with rapidly developing technology, sustained population growth on an unprecedented scale, and a strong sense that the quality of life only improves. Let's all rest assured that there is absolutely no historical evidence showing ecological changes can lead to catastrophes that nearly cause the…

Cubs misery is not even close Cleveland misery—Nobody's misery is close Cleveland misery.

GO SUPERSONICS!

The Simpsons's Treehouse of Horror episodes are on par with the plays of Shakespeare, Mozart's symphonies, and the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel when it comes to Western Civilization's crowning cultural works.

Seasons 3 through 9 are more than enough to secure it as the greatest animated series.

Doubtful. What's next, steroids?

Jesse Owens was such a monster. Shame on him for the way he shoved his views down Hitler's throat.

It's been a while since I checked the Human Rights Campaign's official platform, could you show us the part defining who's a hateful scumbag deserving to die? That's a shocking revelation we really should address. Thanks for pointing that out.

This might have been a rough gig, but it was probably still preferable to being an Anzac soldier at Gallipoli.

Why hasn't this become the official sport of the human race?

These are gorgeous!

If there was a way to make this surface continuously rise and fall in random wave patters, we'd have to the greatest innovation to a basketball since the three-point shot.

They were, but Gordon is kind of a flew in under the radar. He a so-s0 start and any bright spots may have been overshadowed by his suspension. It isn't hard to see that teams could have though of him as a liability. However, Cleveland is probably very thankful they weren't able to unload him because he certainly…

Seriously Josh, go easy on the drugs until retirement. Not only will you have a great career, Cleveland is also very willing to look the other way when it comes to the substance abuse of ex-Browns stars so long as they do not cross what I shall refer to as "the Kosar Threshold."