I have a metric by which I measure my sobriety. If I ever find myself rocking out and really enjoying Kryptonite by 3 Doors Down I immediately cut myself off.

CHICKEN CUTLETS!!!!

Texas’s Major League baseball team is also the Rangers so *shrug*

Don’t let this pale tuber of a man ruin Spiderman for you. Spiderman is more than one individual. Spiderman is an idea...and you can’t grab an idea’s pussy.

She looks like she’s clenched every last molecule in her body so she doesn’t start screaming and spinning her head around.

This will not be surprising to those of us who have been paying attention. If this video surfaces, it’s not going to cause him to lose support with his base. The GOP only really lost their shit when he mentioned harrassing a white woman (as Black Twitter continues to point out.)

I read the title quite quickly and I was very excited when I thought she was starring in a show that sounds pretty close to “Dark Angel.” We’ll see!

Sunday funday drinking game: replace every use of the word rats with the words humans and see how the same article is true.

Every time I read about Iggy Azaleas love life, for one glorious second I think she’s dating French Stewart and for that one second everything in the world is beautiful.

NOPE. This is the genuine celebrity gossip I was raised on before Real Housewives, Teen Moms and their ilk diluted stuff.

Now if G had told Ashly she’d “cunt punt” her if she came at her and Winnie like that again, then maybe they’d be on par.

I don’t like the religion-bashing comments in here, guys. The fact of this being brought to court is laughable, but it’s important to respect other people’s cultures, whether or not you agree with their religious beliefs.

2016 sucks even more now because of your post

Never has your surname been more apropos.

Is he even a real person. That sounds like a made up name to me. Like something out of a comic book who will become a supervillain named Hellfire or something.

Spoiler: The Titanic sinks at the end

In Siberia, maybe both!

That bird just spent a week in the Mission...

It made back its budget plus some in two weeks and performed better then expected. Sounds like a huge flop.

May I suggest breaking up the 3 way with Chip and Joanna and consider a relationship with Nicole Curtis? She does amazing things with old houses in Detroit and Minneapolis, drives a cool Chevy truck and loves dogs.