Bi-athlete In Sochi Arrested

Svendsen continued to downplay the victory later stating, "Au it was nothing."

Due to a speaker glitch, the crowd heard that Vodka Samm was at the game. The University Of Missouri would like to apologize for any confusion that these technical errors may have caused.

He's not my color commentator.

More like Don Bear-y.

How nice of Ennis to use the Olympic break to drive down the Thruway and help the Orange out!

But she really did meet Greg Oden

hey..i'm just shocked he can tweet with those fingers.

Two of my really good friends on the team, Sean Hill and Corey McKeon, asked me at lunch one day, "We were just wondering if you were gay." I very honestly said, "No, I just really like the taste of Coke Zero."

Sounds like the only college football player who was afraid to come out of the closet was Craig James' kid.

As with most other things in Sochi, those burgers were assembled only three days ago.

I catch beers like a motherfucker, and I'm still an asshole.

+.08

All this talk back home of Michael Sam breaking down barriers just to play the sport he loves, he's got NOTHING on old Johnny Quinn.

Pictured: The KGB-Sharps

"Yes, but what would they smell like?"

-Someone who has never, ever been in Manhattan before

Interesting. I wonder what basketball would look like in New York.

"I love my grandfather, too; I just prefer to live what he taught me, and let every day be my tribute to him."

[Gets in car]
[Sits in car]
[Forgets to turn on engine for twenty minutes]
[Returns to house; naps]

-Sidney Crosby

Kane actually owes much of his facetime on Deadspin to Old Grand-dad.